Middle School Years: What to Expect About Building Friendships

What to Expect

   Child:

• Has playmates and friends, feels accepted by peers
• Gets along well with others, enjoys spending time with friends
• Shares well, takes turns
• Brings friends home to play, is invited to friends' homes
• Stands up for self when hurt by peers; copes with teasing or taunting

   Parents:

• Support healthy friendships (know child's friends and their families, invite friends home)
• Supervise child's activities
• Talk with child about friends, school, interests
• Encourage child's social activities, limit TV time
• Help child find ways to solve conflicts with friends or playmates
• Teach child how to be safe near strangers (home, neighborhood, cars, playgrounds)
• Teach skills to resist peer pressures and to cope with teasing

When to Seek Help

   If your child:

• Does not have playmates or friends
• Is not willing to share or take turns with others
• Seems very nervous or shy with others, chooses to be alone much of the time
• Is aggressive or bullies other children (hits, taunts, calls names)
• Feels pressured by others to do things he does not want to do
• Is easily hurt by peers

   Or if you, as parents:

• Worry that your child does not get along with others or has trouble keeping friends
• Notice that your child seems withdrawn or alone much of the time
• Get calls from other parents or neighbors about your child's behavior
• Need tips to help your child build good social skills
• Worry about the types of friends and activities your child chooses
• Observe that your child seems fearful with familiar adults, or too friendly with strangers

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