| Prevent the Sexualization of Your Daughter |
by Vicki Courtney
Chances are you remember the rumblings in the news about the American Psychological Association and their groundbreaking discovery that the proliferation of sexualized images of girls and young women in advertising, merchandising, and media is harmful to girls' self-image and healthy development.1 When I heard it on the news, I stared at my TV in total disbelief and mumbled, "Nah! Ya think?" The study took aim at everything from sexually salacious ads to the tarted-up Bratz dolls popular with young girls. Every forum of media was fair game, including video games, song lyrics, magazines, and the round-the-clock bombardment of sexual images found on television and the Internet.
Read the rest of the article here. |
| Honk if You Love Anti-Christian Bumper Stickers |
by Russell D. Moore
To get to my favorite coffee shop here in Louisville, I pass a lot of bumper stickers intended to make people like me angry. One of them says "Born Okay the First Time." Another says "If You Don't Like Abortion, Don't Have One." And, of course, there are several of the Darwin fish, those metallic signs with the early Christian symbol sprouting legs.
These bumper stickers have spawned an entire industry in American evangelicalism, countering these arguments, with "right back at you" ridicule. I understand the temptation, because some of those bumper stickers used to rile me up too. I would roll my eyes and think how stupid the argument was in front of me. Why does the Wicca devotee really need to tell us, "My Other Car Is a Broom"? Why does the anti-procreation guy have to announce, "My Labradoodle Is Smarter Than Your Honors Student"?
But, it seems to me that Jesus never seemed all that outraged by ridicule. Yes, Jesus would engage, and banter back and forth with his critics. Yes, Jesus would sometimes use some pretty stout sarcasm. But Jesus never seemed to be personally offended. Even when his critics suggested he was demon-possessed (Mk. 3:22-27), Jesus simply turned the conversation around, saying, in effect, "Come on, do you really believe that? Satan vs Satan?"
Read the rest of the article here. |
| Verse of the Month |
Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are His.
He changes times and seasons; He deposes kings and raises up others.
He gives wisdom to the wise
and knowledge to the discerning.
He reveals deep and hidden things; He knows what lies in darkness, and light dwells with Him. ---Daniel 2:20-22
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All or Nothing
by Jill Dillashaw, MA, LPC
It is All or Nothing! Go Big or Go Home! Do it Right or Don't Do it At All! How many of us will admit to living by some of these mottos? Sometimes these can be motivating. But sometimes they can permeate our thinking and lead us down paths of absolutes that leave little way for a life filled with grace. Actually, if we really look, we see these in some of the most basic thinking patterns: "I have to be my best all the time, because nothing but the best is good enough," "If I cannot successfully manage both family and work I might as well not even try," "My marriage failed. Therefore, I am a failure." These thinking patterns can cause anxiety, depression, and just common frustrations.
In the counseling field we call this "All or Nothing Thinking." This phrase was coined by Aaron Beck and it simply means one sees things in black and white categories. If you fall short, you see yourself as a failure. On one end, All or Nothing Thinking causes relatively minor life disturbances: "I will never get my golf swing right," "My hair always looks horrible," "This traffic will never let up!" On the other end, it causes major life impairment: "Life will never change," "I will never be loved," "In this economy, I will never get ahead."
To relieve the frustrations caused by this type of thinking, the goal is to challenge the thought pattern. One can use questions such as what if the opposite positive thing happens? (What if I were to find love, how would I act?) How could the opposite positive thing happen? (How could I find love in my life?) List three reasons the opposite positive thing could happen? Or, list three reasons the (All or Nothing) statement sounds silly, is too extreme, or does not line up with Scripture. Or one might enlist a friend to help talk through the statement.
The real issue with All or Nothing Thinking is how long does a certain thought last? Also, how much does it impair your life? Do others notice it affecting your life? Do you do it in several areas of your life? Do you want it to change?
"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free" (Galatians 5:1). All or Nothing Thinking can rob people of life and joy. People can feel in bondage. They can feel like they are prisoners to their thoughts. In I Peter 5:7, Scripture encourages people to cast (throw away-give up) their worries, anxieties, cares onto GOD because He cares for them. Do not spend time playing worst case scenario with thoughts, let anxieties go. Deal with what one knows. DO the best one can do. Then move on.
So, I encourage you to catch yourself when you use "All or Nothing Thinking." Knowing what you know of God's love and grace for you in your life, employ these strategies, then rest and see what He does. HE really does care for you.
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Marriage Tip
Beating the Ego At Its Own Game
This is what makes marriage such a thrilling enterprise: that it has the power, much more than other more obviously disruptive forces, to change the entire course of a life. Some people go into marriage thinking that they will not have to change much, or perhaps only a little bit along lines that are perfectly foreseeable and within their control. Such people are in for a rough ride. When the terrifying and inexorable process of change sets in, they dig in their heals and refuse to budge, and the ensuing tug-of-war wreaks havoc in every department of their previously comfortable existence.
Marriage, even under the very best of circumstances, is a crisis--one of the major crises of life--and it is a dangerous thing not to be aware of this. Whether it turns out to be a healthy, challenging, and constructive crisis or a disastrous nightmare depends largely upon how willing the partners are to be changed, how malleable they are. Yet ironically, it is some of the most hardened and crusty and unlikely people in the world who plunge themselves into the arms of marriage and thereby submit in almost total naivete to the two most transforming powers known to the human heart: the love of another person and the gracious love of God. So be prepared for a change! Be prepared for the most sweeping and revolutionary reforms of a lifetime.
Generally speaking, there is really only one other event which normally involves a person in a more thoroughgoing, far-reaching program of personal reforms, and that is a religious conversion. When speaking of love and marriage, then, we would do well to keep in mind that this is the order of event with which we have to deal. We are not simply moving in with someone we think it might be fun to live with. Rather, we are giving our prior assent to a whole chain reaction of trials, decisions, transformations, and personal cataclysms which, once they are done with us, may leave us not only changed almost beyond recognition, but marked nearly as deeply as by a religious conversion. And this is just as it ought to be. Love being the most potent of forces, it is hardly surprising that the most overwhelming experiences of life should be those of being in love--first with God and then with another human being.
(source: The Mystery of Marriage by Mike Mason)
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Parent Tip
The Anxious Child
All children experience anxiety. Anxiety in children is expected and normal at specific times in development. For example, from approximately age 8 months through the preschool years, healthy youngsters may show intense distress (anxiety) at times of separation from their parents or other persons with whom they are close. Young children may have short-lived fears, (such as fear of the dark, storms, animals, or strangers). Anxious children are often overly tense or uptight. Some may seek a lot of reassurance, and their worries may interfere with activities. Parents should not discount a child's fears. Because anxious children may also be quiet, compliant and eager to please, their difficulties may be missed. Parents should be alert to the signs of severe anxiety so they can intervene early to prevent complications. There are different types of anxiety in children.
Symptoms of separation anxiety include:
- constant thoughts and intense fears about the safety of parents and caretakers
- refusing to go to school
- frequent stomachaches and other physical complaints
- extreme worries about sleeping away from home
- being overly clingy
- panic or tantrums at times of separation from parents
- trouble sleeping or nightmares
Symptoms of phobia include:
- extreme fear about a specific thing or situation (ex. dogs, insects, or needles)
- the fears cause significant distress and interfere with usual activities
Symptoms of social anxiety include:
- fears of meeting or talking to people
- avoidance of social situations
- few friends outside the family
Other symptoms of anxious children include:
- many worries about things before they happen
- constant worries or concerns about family, school, friends, or activities
- repetitive, unwanted thoughts (obsessions) or actions (compulsions)
- fears of embarrassment or making mistakes
- low self esteem and lack of self-confidence
Severe anxiety problems in children can be treated. Early treatment can prevent future difficulties, such as loss of friendships, failure to reach social and academic potential, and feelings of low self-esteem. Treatments may include a combination of the following: individual psychotherapy, family therapy, medications, behavioral treatments, and consultation to the school.
If anxieties become severe and begin to interfere with the child's usual activities, (for example separating from parents, attending school and making friends) parents should consider seeking an evaluation from a qualified mental health professional or a child and adolescent psychiatrist.
(Used with permission from AACAP)
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Center for Biblical Counseling
1871 Harroun Avenue Suite 300
McKinney, Texas 75069
214.585.4859
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